stole this from the Oatcake, hilarious !
First game in charge, team news announcement….
Tone “Dawson and Macauley will start in the middle of defence. Joleon, you’ll slot in at left back.”
Lescott “Left back boss?”
TP “Just think of it as left sided centre half.”
Lescott “But I’m useless at getting forward?”
TP “That won’t be a problem son.”
TP “Morrison and Dorrans, you’ll operate in the cage”
“What the f****g hell is the cage??”
TP “Dave, get The Bible out”
Kemp “What about Berahino, Tone?”
TP “And he is?”
Kempt “Top scorer, gaff. Little nippy lad….”
Tone “Berahino, you’re on the left wing son……Wisdom, you’ll play on the right”
Wisdom “But I’m a defender boss?”
Tone “Your surname is very fitting, son.”
Tone “….and up top we’ll go with Victor Anichebe.”
Brown Ideye “What?! Jesus Christ gaffer, the club spent £10m on me.”
Tone “Can you play as defensive forward?”
Brown Ideye “Is that even a f***ing position?”
Tone “Kempy…….bible……”
Sessegnon “Excuse me, I think you’ve forgotten me Tony?”
Tone “Nahhhh, we’ll definitely get you on the pitch, no bother son……”
Sessegnon “Excellent, cheers for that boss”
Tone “Kempy, make sure this kiddie is todays mascot…..”
Read more:
http://oatcakefanzine.proboards.com/thread/238511/ssn-pulis-talks-wba#ixzz3NTyKSYSa
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